(mikeH at hit the post included a bit of the poem in the monday randoms post, so glove tap to him.) A few years ago, I read T.S. Eliot's poem "The Hollow Men" for the first time. It was written in 1925 and it draws from two major events: World War I and the Gunpowder Plot of 1605. The last stanza is as follows: This is the way the world ends. This is the way the world ends. This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang, but with a whimper.

That's what tonight's game was. A whimper. No emotion, no passion, no physicality, no anything. Just 20 guys who decided to go to the rink to collect a pay check. As a fan, there is nothing more disappointing then to watch a team who, collectively, make 55 million dollars, play a game that they don't look like they care about. Maybe if said team was in 13th with 70 points, sure, it would at least make sense. But when you are in 9th and you are only two points back, you need to show your fan base something. Even if you may not think the playoffs are a realistic destination, at least give us the impression that you still think you can get there.

I'm not saying the Flames missing the playoffs is in the same league as the world ending, but the failure of this season is going to lead into failures for the next two to three seasons. Things that have been done this year will destroy parts of the team next year and the year after. The utter desperation of Darryl Sutter this year was apparent-the mid season rebuild the size and scope of Calgary's is something only a madman trying to save his job would do. Sutter's demeanor and attitude towards his players and staff has taken it's toll, and it's showing. Hopefully what happened tonight will start the overhaul of the organization.

First, the poll on the Jack Adams post is finally up.  As for why you can't see results- we'll have an award post eventually.  The results are known only to myself and Justin if he's bothered to figure out how to check. (ed: I have no clue.)

"The Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy is awarded annually to the National Hockey League player who best exemplifies the qualities of perseverance, sportsmanship, and dedication to ice hockey." In teams that have players who exemplify none of these, it's awarded to goons or old men.  Just look at some of the nominees this year, Matt Carkner (goon), Mark Recchi (old man), DJ King, (goon), Craig Conroy (awesome old man). Because these criteria are so vague, the Masterton trophy here will be a goon trophy.  So here are your nominees:

The next part of our ongoing NW award series is the Norris trophy.  This trophy, named in honor of a manipulative horrible team owner back in the day is given every year to the best defenseman, since they have so much in common.  Here are the nominees, remember, red ones are mine and blue ones are Justin's.  For voting this time, I'm putting in a poll (and I'll add one to the Jack Adams post too).

It's that time of year when everyone is making their award winner predictions. Obviously some awards need no prediction, like most points or most goals. But most are subjective, and we're making our Northwest Nominee Picks today.

Now, to answer a simple question: why the Northwest? Well, doing just the Flames would be boring and a little depressing. Doing the NHL as a whole is overwhelming and overdone. So we'll stick with who we know (and in the case of 4/5 teams, hate). What's the format here? Justin and I are each picking a nominee from every team for every trophy. For the most part, that means there will be 5 nominees for each trophy, however if we differ on some, then there will be more. The picks made by just me will be in red, and the picks by just Justin will be in blue. We'll have one set of picks a day, with a little snark for each nominee (and the trophy itself).

Today we'll start with the Jack Adams trophy nominees. Obviously, all nominees are unanimous.

1. Brent Sutter, Calgary Flames

Arik: Aaaahahahaha.  Ha.  I think Pat Quinn is a better nominee this year.  Hell, Wayne Gretzky last year would make a better pick, because at least he's never started Toskala in a must-win situation. Or put out the 4th line after the other time iced the puck while we were down a goal with a minute left.

Justin: Wait, Brent has been putting out the fourth line on icings? Why was I not informed? He does realize that by definition the fourth line is the worst one, right? I would like to point out I nominated Dave Lowry for this award over Sutter. (ed. note: I didn't actually read his nominations for Jack Adams, I just kinda assumed they were the 5 head coaches. You can vote for Lowry if you want.)

2. Joe Sacco, Colorado Avalanche

Arik: Wasn't the kid that did the Herb Brooks impression named Sacco as well? Whatever.

Justin: He was, and I don't understand how that kid did that. My sister is 4 and has the attention span of a hummingbird. Oh, yeah, awards. Um, he played Craig Anderson a lot? Good for him!

3. Alain Vin-something-french-ish, Vancouver Canucks

Arik: I'm pretty sure Alain is the most Canadian name in the world. Besides Robin. Also, this guy named his goalie captain. What kind of BS is that?

Justin: I thought his name was Alien? That would explain the absolutely insane opinions and viewpoints he has. Yeah, buddy. Calgary won in 04 on a bad call. The guy was bleeding, you moron.

4. Pat Quinn, Edmonton Oilers

Arik: You know what blew my mind when looking up Pat Quinn? He's a former Flames captain. Granted, it was in the Atlanta days, but STILL. CRAZY. Also, I don't think he's even trying. Just look at his team. Would you try with that group?

Justin: Nope. However, I have no idea why Eberle isn't playing with the big club yet. If that's Quinn's call, he screwed up pretty big. The kid needs experience before he leaves Edmonton after his contract expires.

5. Todd Richards, Minnesota Wild

Arik: I don't think anyone has paid Mr. Richards a speck of attention this year after being sort of a wtf hire in the offseason. It's like, the Wild let their best offensive player go then think, hey, maybe we should play an offensive style. With a guy who's never been an NHL coach before.  Weird year.

Justin: To be fair, they did go out and sign the greasiest player in the league, one Martin Havlat. He then decided to shower in celebration and all of his production went out the window. 54 points and a -17? Good for him and his 5 million!

And those, folks, are your nominees for the 2010 Jack Adams. So how is the winner picked? You vote! Simply post your vote in the comments section, either anonymously or not- your call- and we'll count it. Also, if you are a lady and voting, you must email Justin your votes with your phone number for...verification. (I love you Justin.)

Voting is closed!

I am much too tired due to the tryptophan vessel that is turkey to write something proper about the loss to the Blackhawks, so have a laugh at my expense instead of thinking about the 3rd last nail in the coffin. (editor's note: In an effort to SOMEHOW relate this to the Flames, I will be trying to force this into a metaphor for...something. The playoffs? Yeah. Sure. My comments will be in red italics like this.)

Yesterday, while driving to work (this is clearly an allegory for the offseason and preseason), I decide to pull over to the local watering hole (Starbucks) (Didn't Dion have his SUV get stolen at a Starbucks? Not relevant, just...yeah.) and order my 2nd favorite beverage (this is like signing Bouwmeester instead of Cammi, it's not BAD per se, but why not get your favorite?). While ordering, a cute girl (OMG, right?) tells me that she also likes that drink (Much like other GMs liking J-Bow and forcing us to trade Leopold and pay an outrageous amount).

Now, most of the time I am scared shitless to talk to members of the opposite sex, so in most situations like this I would give a nervous laugh and never think of it again. However, I was feeling especially brave due to the new tires I just had installed on my vehicular device (there's 800 bucks down the drain. Thankfully, it wasn't my money. Awesome early birthday present, if I do say so myself) (Daz spends other people's money too!) and decided to take the drink-liking into a deeper conversation. We eventually got two stools at those weird bar things with the lights that hang about a foot from the surface, and proceeded to talk (Not the point, but I thought you were on your way to work). This conversation included many things, like the Flames flag I had on my car, my little sister (symbolizing the Abbotsford Heat), and annoying siblings (every underachieving Flames prospect ever).

I did eventually have to get to work, so I figured that this girl had taken enough of an interest in me to warrant me asking if she would like to continue the converation some other time. So I told her I had to go to work, and I asked for her number (obviously a date is the playoffs.  Or is sex the playoffs? No- that's the Cup). What happened next was rather unexpected (JUST LIKE THE TORONTO TRADE!).

She laughed at me (I feel the post-season laughing at me everyday in my heart). I know, right? WTF? The last thing she said before leaving was that she had no interest in guys like me (sad trombone). What, you don't want to go out with a fat kid who writes on the internet (hey, men who write on the internet are considered very sexy in some cultures. Mostly that's because they have enough money for the Internet period. Oh right- Flames)? What is wrong with you?

Now that I think about it, asking for her number without knowing her name was probably a bad idea (much like trading for Kotalik without realizing he sucks and has been scratched a ton this year by the RANGERS FOR CHRISSAKE for good reasons).

Anyways, have a happy Easter (if you celebrate it). (I think the same problem applies to both the Flames and poor Justin: a lack of scoring. BAM. Also I know the pain.)

I really want to bring to light the excellent work our friend (ed: Justin is using the word "our" in the sense the Queen of Canada- you guys have a Queen, right?- uses the word "our". It's the royal "our")(ed 2: Yep, still the actual leader of the country, although it's more symbolic than anything.) DomeBeers.com did a couple of days ago. It seems a fan from Vancouver, the douchebag-hipster capital of Canada, thinks that the Flames and their fans suck. Well, I would like to take another opportunity to spew hate at those assholes, and add a couple of points on to DB's argument:

1. You have two of the most universally hated players in the game. No one commands as much respect as Ryan Kesler (ed: screw you he's an upstanding American hero among the likes of George Washington, Ulysses Grant, and Will Smith in Wild Wild West)(ed 2: I like most Americans. He's still an asshole.) and Alex Burrows do. Real class act, stand-up guys. They only play dirty, whine more than my 4-year-old sister, and fake injury on a regular basis (ed: quick correction, in 5 NHL seasons Kesler has only missed 2 games)(ed 2: he still fakes injury a ton.) Check out this video: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lK0GWEVzQw&feature=related] The thing that pisses me off the most about them? They refuse to be accountable for their actions. They run and hide behind pylons like Rick Rypien and Darcy Hordichuk (ed: SCREW THOSE GUYS AMIRIGHT ) (ed 2: YA UR RIGHT) who collectively have less brain cells then the average embryo.

2. Your "Captain" flops and whines, and is invisible when it matters most. First of all, he doesn't have a "C" on his jersey, so he isn't your captain. Secondly, the guy has the groin strength of a 9-year-old. He has never won a big game. Never. Always chokes in the playoffs. The Olympics don't count-he wasn't the starting goalie to begin with, and only got the job because the guy in front of him stunk up the joint. His save percentage against Germany was a sterling .910!  He's so good he's never been out of the second round! [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaIFewAD9Bc&feature=related]

3.Willie Mitchell and the Parade! Yeah, you all know it. It's coming this year, I promise! [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DP0AxAuTR0k]

4. The Canucks have never won anything. As much as you guys like to give us crap about how we hang on to 1989, the Flames have at have that to celebrate. What exactly hangs in the rafters of Bankrupt Motors Place? Division Titles? We have those too. Western Conference Championship banners? We got 3. Retired numbers? Lanny's moustache out-classes them all. Our mascot was the first and is better than yours. Remember the last time the Canucks had a chance to win a cup? [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5Vfig0u2-s&feature=related]

5. Remember the last time we met in the playoffs? [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHJnN0t3XwA&feature=related] Yeah, that's what I thought. Suck it, Vancouver! (ed: SUCK IT HARD) (ed 2: REAL HARD)

Mitch Wahl

The kid has hockey smarts, work ethic, and in this particular photo a face that looks like it should come with "Made In Taiwan" imprinted on the backside.

Provided he doesn't take a step back, he'll make the Flames in 2-3 years.